road relay was good.. i really enjoyed it.. though got a tiny bit of complication midway.. cos the m4s were leading after the first leg so we decided to send our best runners instead of sticking to the original formation.. so Hope took over me loh.. i was perfectly alright with it loh cos i noe i wasnt a very gd runner and anw i ran for the other team and it was satisfying nonetheless.. i juz hope wl doesnt feel too bad abt it.. oh yah our first team came in first la and second team came in fourth with me anchoring haha.. damn lousy la.. i got a bit of lead but got overtaken at the turning point.. but that guy was damn gd la..
i am quite worried for the cas but who isnt? maybe the worry is a bit uncalled for la.. i m sure when the results come out most pple will do fine one.. sometimes we give ourselves too much stress..
i went thru my past entries that day.. a lot of emotion and feelings.. i still remembered the time i started this blog.. never ever was i so down and depressed.. felt so lonely and so helpless.. but He gave me hope..
it is hard to forget.. really.. those were the good times when i truly felt that this will be it.. the one.. maybe i was too simplistic then.. too naive.. i was a dreamer.. in a way, i still am now..
sometimes i felt if i have done things differently, the ending would not have been the same.. i wish i could go back in time.
i want to relive those moments.. those "first times".. there were so many.. it felt so good then, i thought there will never be a second one.. perhaps there never will be..
i have changed a lot between now and back when i started this blog.. maybe time has healed the wounds.. but perhaps the more impt factor is that i am beginning to see things frm a different perspective after embracing Christianity.. that not everything is abt "me", "myself" and "I".. that not everything must turn out your way.. if only i haf realised this earlier..
i am really happy with the way my life is now.. i have gotten over it.. most of it.. my heart still aches sometimes.. memories still come back..
a lot has changed.. a lot hasnt too.. if given a second chance, i want to do it all over again..
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