Friday, February 18, 2005
some random thoughts..
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some things i just cannot fathom.. and i never will..
i believe in God's will for me..
God did everything for a purpose, sometimes one which is beyond human understanding..
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i'll worship You, my God; 11:16 PM
Wednesday, February 16, 2005
seems a very long time since i last blogged. perhaps i have been too busy..
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had one of the most hectic chinese new years in my life.. visited the usual relatives on the first 2 days.. den friday i met my auntie and her children and grandchildren from china.. long story.. my mum's father had 2 wives, one in china and one in singapore.. so this aunt is my ah yi from china, borne by my china wai po.. whom i have never met in my life.. actually come to think of it, i have only met my maternal grandma.. and only up till 6 years old when she passed away.. the other 3 grandparents either died b4 my memory was established or they did so b4 i was born..
oh where was i? yup so they came to visit us.. apparently they are quite rich now, owning 3 factories in shenzhen and dongguan.. so my mum and my 2 jiu jiu (mum's younger brothers) and our families brought them around for the next 2 days.. sat we went to the bird park.. and sunday we brought them to sentosa.. had lots of good food this chinese new year because of them.. haha.. most farnie sight was when the 4 families all tried to foot the bill or buy admission tickets.. anyway had a really fun cny lah at the expense of my robbins, rang & dale, jawetz..
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think this coming ca confirmed screwed already.. i am so unprepared that i am having a laid back attitude to it now..
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sometimes u lose sight of what u set out to achieve.. den u go back to your old self and everything goes haywire.. like now.. need a lot of determination and divine intervention.. time to set things in order again.. anyway clinicals are starting soon, hopefully it will be a new start.. God willing..
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i'll worship You, my God; 3:33 PM
Saturday, February 05, 2005
i enjoy listening to sad songs.. i wonder why.. maybe i enjoy feeling sad and wallowing in self pity.. i think i am a pretty screwed up person..
and talking abt screwing up.. i think i really screwed up today.. i think my Broca's area is not very well-developed.. there is something abt me getting nervous and fumbling and tripping over my words for no good reason..
cas are one month away.. always try to tell myself not to place too much importance on the cas.. but somehow dont like the feeling of going into a ca unprepared and worse realising that u barely passed while the rest of the cohort are getting 70s and 80s..
having incoherent thoughts.. shall blog them if they can rearrange themselves somehow.. not very clear what i am thinking too.. have i said here b4 that i am a confused person??
i'll worship You, my God; 1:12 AM