Saturday, June 18, 2005
i am determined not to feel ashamed of the gospel anymore. last time i was very afraid to talk about christianity on my blog.. i was afraid to admit to relatives and friends that i am a christian.. in a way i was ashamed of christianity.. i was afraid that people would think i am weird.. i want to fit into the crowd.. i was afraid people would speak behind my back, gossiping about how stupid i was to convert and stuff.. and i am sure people did speak about me, even my friends, i am dead sure about that.. i think i was afraid bcos i wasnt sure yet, and i wasnt ready to submit to God's authority..
now i think there is really nothing shameful about being a christian.. indeed its really a great privilege to be one.. i think there are people out there who constantly deny the truth of the bible despite having read it.. i am privileged bcos thru God's grace, i have been enabled to accept the teachings of the bible and made to grow in understanding of it and being made more and more aware of how true the bible is..
and i accept that i am weird.. this is wat i told someone just now haha.. bcos i am a stranger on this world not living according to the rules and worldly desires of this world but according to God's will and laws.. i don't belong here, i am only a passing tourist, an out-of-the-world foreigner..
and i am not unhappy.. i am happier now than before i became a christian.. i have more direction in life now, not the aimless chicken i was before.. i am more contented now too bcos everything in this world is just in passing and temporary. life is less of a struggle now because u noe whats right and whats wrong according to God.. whereas in the past i do things according to my own conscience and everything is in a mess..
i am proud to be a christian.
i'll worship You, my God; 1:39 AM
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